New Year, New Look?

This post is difficult to write for me, because I always pride myself on trying to maintain my apperance to the best of my abilities, and I realized that an area where I totally failed is my hair.

Yes, that's right, I'm admitting it. A couple of posts ago, a few commenters mentioned that my hair was looking a little "bottom heavy" (I had never heard that expression before, but I knew what they meant.) One of them commented "maybe it's time for a change." Well, they were right, it is.

Typically, I take criticisms with a grain of salt, but this one really got to me because as much as I wanted to deny it, I knew it was true.

For the last few months, every time I've blown out my hair, I've noticed that my ends are pouffy, frizzy, frazzled. I have more split ends than I can count. My hair, despite all of my efforts just ends up "hanging there." It's long, it's heavy, it's blah. Sure, I wanted long hair, but the price I'm paying for it just doesn't seem worth it.

Now, before I delve further into this, I want to relay to my lovely readers that this isn't at all my hairdresser's fault. He is brilliant but I limit him when it comes to cutting because I am so afraid to lose my length that I've spent over three years growing (my hair is like the slowest growing hair ever.) My micro-trims just aren't cutting it anymore, no pun intended.

I still want to have long hair, but I need to do something...more layers, a little more of my ends snipped off, the front pieces cut shorter...I need SOMETHING that is going to get my hair out of this rut.

I'm going too wait until after my vacation to make the cut. I just feel like since I'll be exposing my hair to so much sun and salt water etc, that it probably isn't the best idea to do it before I leave for vacation.

So I have almost a month to find pictures of haircuts and styles I like.

Here are a few I like right now:

I love the way her hair is styled and how the front layers are shorter. I've tried side bangs before and they just don't work for me, but these just look like face-framing layers.

No matter how many times or which hairdresser I've ever been too, none can seem to cut my hair exactly like Carrie's (above), minus the bangs. I absolutely love how bouncy and shapely her hair looks.
I love Jennifer Garner's hair in this pic. It just looks really full and bouncy. I like the way it's parted too.Cheryl Cole is definitely one of my favorite hair inspirations. It looks like she's got a bunch of layers through her hair and some shorter face-framing layers. Like I said before, I grew my face framing layers out so long, that they don't really frame anymore, they just hang. Ugh.

Here's another one of Cheryl. I just like how full and bouncy her hair is and how much volume she has. I also like it when you can tell where layers start and end. I feel like my hair just all blends together into one big curtain right now.

No hair post is complete without a picture of VS model Alessandra Ambrosio. I love her soft curls here. You can tell she's got some pretty layers through her hair.

This look is a little more polished, but I like how much volume she has and how smooth her hair looks. I'd want to keep mine a bit longer than that though.

Sigh. Blake Lively. I love this pic from her Marie Claire photo shoot. Her hair just looks perfect and voluminous and has texture to it. Maybe I just don't have enough texture going on or I need to try different products. I would love it if I could make my hair look like this. Love.

Ladies, if you have any suggestions for me, I'm open. If you have any styles you think would suit me, please post a link in the comments below (nothing short though, I don't want to go into shock!)

My hair is definitely my security blanket...but it might be time to let go and just have an actual style to my hair. I also want to start styling it wavy again, I miss that sometimes.

I always feel bad because people tell me how much they like my hair...but trust me, it doesn't always look great! I've gotten lazy in maintaining it, and its lost its shape, luster and volume.

Thanks for listening to my rant. All thoughts and opinions welcome (unless they involve a serious chop!)




  1. Good luck! I know how scary it can be. I cut mine short a little while ago and now I am in a panic to get it long before my wedding in 5 months. And by the way, I loved the way you had your hair styled for your wedding and it is how I want mine done for my wedding. I think you have lovely hair!!

  2. I am so proud of you with this post. It takes a very strong person to take criticism and turn it into constructive criticism you can grow and learn from. I really admire that!!

    I have basically the same cut as the ones you posted. VERY long layers on the back, but angled ones around my face. Like I just posted, my stylist just told me I needed to get rid of 1/2 inch of dead hair. Yuck. Just think how much bouncier and healthier it will look now being that's it's all alive! You may be surprised at how fast your hair will grow now that you're getting rid of the dead weight. My hair grows like a weed, even with the 1/2 inch chops here and there. Good Luck!! xoxoxoxo

  3. Tara- my wedding hair had extensions in it (but I did love it).

    I am not wanting to cut my hair off, I am just wanting to have it cut completely differently so that it has shape and bounce to it again. I used good products and styling techniques, but I think my hair just won't hold style anymore because it's not healthy and shaped well.

  4. thanks andi- that is sweet of you to say!

    I just wish I had maintained my hair better and not have to make this post in the first place...but I'm OK with it!

    I'm excited to look for pictures and just look forward to having something new and different. :)

  5. I completely understand your dilemma Veronika. My hair is my security blanket as well, mainly because it was very short for most of my childhood. We all seem to want that long, flowy, sex-kitten mane! I strive for it all the time, but no matter what products I try or how i choose to style it, it never looks the way I want it to. I'm just not that good at styling my own hair. The only time I ever really love it is after I get it done. Anyway, I think all of the pictures you have chosen are beautiful! I think they would all suit you. Just pick one that really speaks to you and go for it! I know that cutting off length can be traumatic, but I think its worth it. Healthy hair is beautiful, no matter what the length! Good luck!

  6. thanks beautygirl :) I'll have a month or so to go over my decision, so I'm sure I'll feel connected to one style or another soon!

    I had really thin/baby fine hair for most of my childhood, so I guess I should appreciate that I even have a lot of hair at all.

  7. Hair can be so frustrating! I have the complete opposite issue that you do; mine grows like a weed! Maybe you can break into it by cutting off a few inches overall, maintaining some length, but go for some soft, face framing layers like those in the pics you posted. I'm sure that whatever you go with will look fantastic!

  8. I have baby fine hair as well, and you can still pull off the Cheryl Cole look with it. I find that in order to get that kind of volume up top you just have to backcomb both the sides and the crown of the hair.

    I think that you should go with something like Cheryl's, or like Carrie's. I think Jillian Harris's haircut would look nice on you too. I do really like the color you have now though so I wouldn't change that :)

  9. katie-thanks for the advice, that's what I really want to go for- more defined, face-framing layers. Wouldn't it be great if we could all get exactly what we want when we show a picture to our stylist? I guess it doesn't work that way (and we also have to remember that celebs have awesome extensions that look real, so you'd never know their hair was enhanced)

    kas- i need to learn to tease my hair to get that look! I'm always paranoid I'll break it if I tease too hard! Thanks for your advice- and don't worry, i love the color too and will keep it as-is!

  10. I have extremely long, fine hair, and it's become frustrating to deal with. I know it doesn't look great, but I'm not ready to cut it. You could try silicone products, if you haven't already. John Frieda products are good. It helps with split ends and frizz, and has made me like my hair again, if not love it.

  11. Lady- I've tried them all! Nothing is seeming to tame it and I guess I've grown tired of masking the problem. I'm ready to move on :)

    Thanks for your tips though! The products do helo to an extent, but nothing can bring it back to life (not literally, figuratively speaking, I realize hair is dead, hehe)

  12. Those hairstyles (and your hair) are beautiful. I love the Jillian Harris hair idea. I do think you should cut a touch more off that those pictures, even if you don't go as short as Jillian's hair. I think it will do wonders in giving your hair more body. I'm sure your stylist knows his stuff. Ask him what he would do to your hair if he could do anything at all.

  13. Great post. I have a similar problem, but yours will be fixed quickly, easily and beautifully with a cut - I'm sure of it.

    I just don't DO much with my hair and it's probably one of my biggest F&B failures! It's always tied up! Your post is inspiring.

    Can't wait to see the new 'do!

  14. I don't think that's Jillian Harris...her name is Vanessa something..I forget if she is a model or an actress. I found the pic on! I will check.

    I once asked my stylist what he would do to my hair and he said he would add red too it! I only like (real) looking shades of red hair (like isla fisher or when ashlee simpson had red hair) so that wouldn't work for me as a highlight...but it's a nice thought! I think he would be too afraid to tell me how he would cut it! I might have a panic attack haha!

  15. Anh- at least you can tie your hair back! your face is so beautiful! I wish I had the confidence to pull my hair back more often than just the gym.

  16. it's Spanish actress Vanessa Romero:

  17. shenae grimes has some cute looks too:

  18. I'm totes taking a pic of Jen Garner to my stylist. LOVE that look!

  19. kristin- I love it too! It's great if you love side-bangs. If you google image jennifer garner, you'll see she just has awesome hair in general :)

  20. Hey Veronika,

    Here is a good vid on how to create more volume at the top a la Cheryl:

    I totally get bottom heavy because of my fine hair too and if you just make the top bigger it makes it so that your hair is big everywhere, not just at the bottom.

    In the vid she uses a brush, but I recommend a rat tail comb. I backcomb every single day and the comb is much gentler.

    You should also check out Nadine Coyle who is also in Cheryls band. She doesn't have a ton of layers like those pics above but I think you look a lot like her so her styles might look nice on you!

  21. I think the second pic (Carrie) would suit you nicely. Its very pretty.

  22. V- I think the only picture that would make you actually "change" your haircut would be the pic of Carrie. I think you have beautiful hair now! If you truley want to change then I vote for the Carrie hair! -Shelly

  23. I also just saved Jen Garner's pic.. I just adore her.

    Why don't you ask your stylist to do what he's thinks is best? I've been going to my stylist for years so he really 'knows' my hair and how it reacts (where it's curlier, where it gets heavy, where it parts, etc)... I give him direction like saying I want to keep it long, and the rest is up to him, he is the professional!

    He has never done anything drastic, if anything I wish he would surprise me more...

    also (sorry for the long comment) try BedHead "After Party" to smooth your fly aways and frizz... its a cream based smoother (not silicone), I've been swearing by it for years....

  24. I love this post - it made me realize that I am 100% in this same situation! I am not printing these pictures out to bring to my stylist! Thank you so much for the wake up call & inspiration!

  25. Meghalina- I am glad to have inspired someone! Maybe we can go on our hair-altering journey together!

  26. I love all the hair inspirations that you posted. I know what you mean about your layers just hanging like a curtain and not showing individual layers. I really want to get my hair into good shape in 2010... and that is a big goal because my hair is currently a.huge.mess.

  27. Great post, love the inspiration images. I am looking for a change for my hair as well. I would go for Carrie Underwood or Jen Garner's looks. Both are beautiful.

  28. I know how traumatic chopping your long locks can be! 1. I'm a hair stylist - I see it all the time. Many of my clients have come to me, we've talked it over, and I let them sleep on it. When they are 100% sure they want their hair cut off, I do it. They still go into shock. It's natural. 2. I did it to myself. I had hair down to the middle of my back and one day decided to go from black to platinum. Beauty school mistake - I ended up with a faux hawk. No joke. So here's my suggestion. Have your stylist take your layers up a few inches. If your hair is looking bottom heavy, he'll have to take anywhere from 1" - 3" off of your length but when you think about it, it's not much. The saying of "the more you trim your hair, the faster it grows" is false but here's what is true: the more often you go in for trims, the less length will need to be cut. Just keep that in mind for the future! And good luck! All of the pictures you posted are beautiful!


  29. I don't see anything wrong with your hair to begin with. I like it.

  30. Janine- you are so sweet! I like my hair too, but it's very damaged and lacking shape and volume, despite my efforts. Thank you for your kind words though. I realize I am fortunate to have been able to even grow my hair to length it is now.


  31. Jessica- you are so right! I hardly ever cut mine which means it breaks more often and the split ends go even higher. I really need to committ to taking better care of it!

  32. I think that the Cheryl Cole cut is a great place to start. It's pretty similar to your current haircut, just more layers! Not too drastic and will look great on you.

  33. Oooh, try Aerate by Redken. I was in the same boat a few weeks ago, and once I started using it with my favorite round brush, it's like a whole new head of hair.

  34. Just here to lend some moral support. I had a zinc deficiency that I found out about last summer and it destroyed my hair texture.. my hair was nearly down to my waist at the time and it went from being thick and smooth to frazzled, thin and curly (and breaking all the time), dull looking, and I was losing a ton of it every day. It was pretty much like a horror movie, LOL! After a while agonizing over potentially trying to salvage with expensive treatments and stuff I finally not only cut it off but cut it off into a pixie to just let it all regrow as healthy hair. It was really scary but at the same time, it was a relief to get back to a place where I was happy with my hair (after the fact, obviously). I know you're not going for something nearly as drastic, but I can promise you it's only scary at first and I doubt you'll regret it. I love all the hairstyles you posted- I think Jennifer Garner's would look awesome in particular. Good luck!

  35. Veronika, I think you would do well with Cheryl Cole's look -- and I'm not just saying that because I have the same haircut! :) It's still long but will definitely be a fresher look. Side bangs don't work for me either and the face framing layers are a nice compromise! Good luck!!

  36. Hey girl! You have great hair, any of these looks would look hot on you! Just go for it! Oh, and I nominated you for an award today, check it out!

  37. My hair is about 2 inches shorter than yours and I was having the same problem. It was long and heavy and had no shape. My layers had grown out and didn't frame my face anymore. I went to get my hair cut and my stylist convinced me to get shorter layers. They start right at about my chin (maybe a little shorter)and go down from there. I was shocked at first, but now I LOVE IT! I have SOOO much more volume and I have so many more options for styling my hair. I can create lots of volume with my round brush, completely straighten it, curl it with my flat iron, or wear my natural wave and they all look fabulous with minimal effort.

    Also, I've had several people tell comment about how long my hair has gotten since I've gotten my hair cut. It seems weird that they would say that immediately after the cut but I guess the layers make it appear longer or something?

    I think you should cut about a 1/2 in. off to get rid of the dead ends and layer it like crazy. You'll still have the length, but the layers will add so much more shape and volume because your hair won't be quite so heavy anymore.

  38. Well - I had a similar struggle in the summer. My hair had been looking 'not right' for almost 8 months, despite the trims and other tactics.

    I finally bit the bullet and had my stylist cut about 3-4 inches (gasp! because like you, I had been growing it for a while and it was looong). You know, I am very happy with the result, my hair looks so much better and I have learned my lesson with getting too many microtrims.

    But I will say, in this instance it was my stylist's fault. He loved the long hair and insisted I could maintain the look by cutting very small amounts. Well, I think that's only accurate to a point. By cutting off that small amount, my hair is SO much bouncier than before and really, it's still long!

    Just do it! Good luck.

  39. You're nuts. I don't see anything wrong with your hair. There's always someone out there who is not going to like the way you look. That's just life. I find it strange that one person says something about your hair and all of a sudden you have to do something about it. So if someone said something about your nose would you get rhinoplasty? You seems very insecure and obsessed with perfection. You are fine the way you are.

  40. anon- I'm flattered you think my hair is fine the way it is. My hair is very damaged with a lot of split ends, and the layers are very gown out and need to be re-cut to give my hair some movement and volume.

    I certainly am not changing my hair because of the comments on my blog. The comments just made me further realize something I already knew: that I needed a change.

    Comparing a haircut and rhinoplasty is very extreme. Hair grows back, noses don't. It's not just a minor change that can be reversed if you get plastic surgery.

    I am not an insecure person. Sure, every girl has her insecurities, but generally I am a confident person. I'm not obessed with perfection, I just like to be the best I can be, and I am 100% aware of the fact that the best I can be is not perfect. No one is perfect, and I will certainly never come close to that (nor is it my goal to.)

    Thanks for sharing your comments!

  41. omg i FREAKING loved that marie claire shoot of Blake!!! I am posting about it soon!

  42. Hey Veronika - it appears that you have extremely thick hair, which can often get lost in long layers. Rather than work against that - work with it! Get some short layers will allow your hair to have volume at the crown.

    I am EXTREMELY JEALOUS of you for this - I have ridiculously thin hair (about the thickness of a thick sharpie marker when put in a ponytail -__-).

    Youtube celebrity Bubbi also has very thick hair and so she works with that (and she'll still do waves like you like as well) - here's just one vid but shes got TONS about her hair:

    I kniow you're paranoid about getting it cut so short (the layers at least) but perhaps suggest to your hair stylist slightly longer layers? See how you like it! Honestly every time you get your hair cut it looks the same to me - but if you don't experiment you'll never know what works for you!!

    Good luck V!

  43. annette- I actually have very thin hair- I just have a lot of it, but the texture itself it finer. I already do have long layers around my entire head, I guess they've just grown out. Most of my hair looks fine, its the ends that pouff out and get frizzy, so my main concern is finding something that will tame them.

    I will definitely try to get some layers that are a bit different from the usual :) thanks for the advice!


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